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7/19/05 12:46 pm

I'm back bitches.
That whole "last week of being a whore on the internet" thing didn't work out. And I've basically given up on making a CD. My computer decided it was time to just blow up so everything I had saved at that point is gone. Sucks.

So anyways I'm back. And I'll update this piece of shit once in a while. Check out the real deal [ADH]. That gets updated a whole lot more.

5/25/05 06:47 pm

Countdown to Nothing
This is gonna be my last week being a whore on the internet. I'm just about ready to start my music project and I'm getting another real job to fund everything I'm about to start doing. The internet is a bad influence. I've been using it since I was at least 10. AOL 1.0. Memories. Anyways I've decided that I need to stop going on here and focus on things that are more important. Music being #1. Music is my religion. Fuck with it and I will kill you.

If you wanna keep in touch use my email address. beforeth3dawn@yahoo.com. And for people I know outside of aim/yahoo/myspace if you want my # just let me know. It'd be kind of awesome to get calls from random people but I won't have time for that either so no digits on here sorry. I'll keep this thing updated with everything I'm doing and I'll pop online from time to time when I'm not doing anything else.

Keep it evil. -trend

5/24/05 06:14 pm

Wookies don't have a penis.
Bunch of stuff happened lately. I started doing some web design crap for people. That's fun. It's more like dicking around on the computer and getting paid for it. I don't have any complaints but I'm just not creative enough to bust out something new all the time. Once I'm out of layouts I'll stop doing it. For another 4 years. Just like last time. Except last time I was getting insane amounts of $$$. Mostly because I was ahead of the game before all you fucking piece of shit art school bitches decided "Hey! I can make web pages and get money!". Yea you know who you are. Fuck you. Anyways. I'm getting a cell phone again pretty soon. Apparently people wanna talk to me. What are the odds? I'll post up the digits once I get it hooked up. Star Wars fucking ROCKED. Could've been a bit longer with all the cool fight scenes but it's based on a Star Wars plot formula so I guess there's not much you can do. Mace Windu got his fucking hands cut off and tossed out a window. But he fucked shit up before that so it's all good. Ok on to the good stuff.

Beer + Canceling Accounts on the Phone = FUNNY
So I got this Wholesale Marketer bullshit account. Basically you sell their shit on ebay and make like 25 cents profit for everything you sell. Sounds easy right? Wrong. There's already someone else on ebay with the same item (probably stolen) selling it for 25 dollars cheaper. Well fuck that shit. Why am I paying some douche-bag company just to end up having to pay another douche-bag company's fees for listing crap things that nobody is gonna buy? So I wrote down the number to cancel. And I saved it to the desktop. Well 2 days later after about 16 beers I accidentally opened it. And from there it went pretty much like this.

WM: Thank you for calling Wholesale Marketing this is #### speaking how may I help you?
ME: Hey #### I'm just calling to cancel my account.
WM: Oh I'm sorry to hear that. Was there something we could've done better?
ME: Well. You could've made the things for sale a bit cheaper.
WM: We have the lowest wholesale products around did you read our...
ME: Yea that's nice. I can't sell your shit on ebay because other people already have the same shit for less.
WM: I see. Well what I can do is..
ME: No. You aren't listening. What you can do is cancel my account. Are all you phone people like this?
WM: I don't understand.
ME: Trying to get me to buy more shit and spend more money on something I don't want.
WM: Well if you would let me finish.
ME: Ok. Shoot. (asshole)
WM: What I can do is offer you half the price you're paying now, 1 free month, and a list of the top 100 sellers in our item warehouse.
ME: And I don't have to pay anything?
WM: No.
ME: So what do you get out of it?
WM: At the end of the first month we charge you $14.99 instead of the normal $29.99.
ME: So basically you're giving me half off and letting all those other poor suckers who signed up get fucked in the ass?
WM: Uh.. I guess.. yea.
ME: Well I can live with that. Where do I sign up?
WM: I'll have that top 100 list emailed to you right away.
ME: Sweet.
WM: It takes a lot of work to get started. Some people make up in the thousands a month.
ME: ...
WM: There we go all set. You will be billed $14.99 a month at the end of your free trial.
ME: Nah I'll probably call back and cancel before then. Your whole company still sucks. Thanks anyway ####.

Yea. I'm an asshole. Oh well I wasn't as mean as I could've been. I gotta get one of those phones that lets you record the convos on the pc. It's funnier to listen to than it is to just read it. Keep it evil.

5/2/05 02:43 am

Fuck your values
No. Fuck you. If you're going to say that to me at least attempt to use that little tidbit of knowledge you obtained from going through the 2nd grade the 4th time. The correct way to say it would be, "Get IT done." Nowhere does an "R" belong in that sentence. And I have no fucking clue how it got there in the first place.

American Idol
This is the first year I succumbed to the trend and sat down to watch American Idol. It was lame just like I suspected. But I figured I would follow it through and see who wins. Turns out that after a certain amount of weeks the people of America get to vote for their favorites and the person with the lowest votes go home. Well that's fucking dumb. It's obvious Americans are fucking retarded these days. See above. Well anyway this one site popped up and caught my attention. VotefortheWorst.com. It's this group of people that get everyone who thinks the show is full of shit to vote for the worst contestant. I think that's a spectacular idea. That's how it should be. The guys that made it to the end were voted on by semi-professional opinions. Paula's doesn't count because she's clearly out of her mind. So after that point the ones that are good will get record deals if they deserve them. The winner should be someone that doesn't have a shot in hell at making a CD. I swear if that fat guy wins I would so buy his CD.

Those guys
Those fucking guys. You know the type. They sit there and force their opinions on you and they think they know everything there is to know about everything. And no matter what you say or do you're wrong and they can top it with a full of shit story from their bullshit library. Case in point. I was minding my own business in the grocery store looking around aimlessly when this older guy in his 70s comes up next to me. "You know when I was your age, we didn't wear baggy clothes like that. We didn't want to look like criminals." Took me by surprise but ok.. I've been called worse before. I let it slide. A minute later.. "Does your family know you dress like that? I would be ashamed if my grandson wore those kind of things." So. I sighed and said yes my mother knows I dress like this. Well you'd have thought I just shot someone in the face. He looked like he'd seen the devil fucking his mother. "You have no respect young man you're just another street hoodlum" (holy shit he actually said hoodlum) "If I had my way kids like you wouldn't be allowed to walk the streets.". To which I laughed and walked away. Now that I think about it, my response should've gone something like this.. "Look old man, I'm 23, I can wear whatever the fuck I want, I can do whatever the fuck I want, and your narrow-minded, sad pathetic wrinkled up ass can suck on my left testicle. It's a shame you didn't get shot in the fucking face when you went to war for this country. That would've been a better deed then leaving your sorry ass to wander around a fucking store bitching and groaning because you can't get it up anymore. Dickwad." Sometimes you just gotta bite the bullet though. I could've cared less about his comments I know I dress like a scumbag I do it on purpose. I could go out and buy some GQ clothes and shave and stand up straight. But that just wouldn't be me.

Those parents
Those fucking mindless parents. The ones that go to the store with 20 kids and end up leaving them to run around causing all sorts of chaos in the store. They run through the aisles pretending they're cops and robbers and they run in front of people's carts and knock shit over and if you do happen to get lucky enough to run one of the fuckers over they start screaming and crying like you just ripped off their fucking arm. Then the noble parents come over and bitch and bitch and bitch at you to make it seem like they're great fucking parents. Well they aren't. Truth is they couldn't care less what happens to their kid. They let them run free so shit like this eventually will happen to them. And why? Because they like to act like they're tough and bad and they think maybe they can sue you for harming the kid. Well fuck them. People like that don't deserve to have kids. I think this country should follow suit with the pet population problem. Cats are overpopulating cities? Well so are stupid fucking inbred redneck pieces of shit. Start spaying those fuckers from now on and the world will be much better off. Assholes.

This isn't a gripe. This is just advertising. 2 cents for every search you do. Click it. Sign up. Thanks. Click Here.

4/20/05 06:03 pm

Products I Endorse
Someday when I'm rich and famous I'm going to be shameless and promote products that I think are super awesome. Not because I'll need the money. Just because I'm tired of people like Daisy Fuentes doing commercials for some gay yoga thing. No. Instead it will be me on tv. With a fucking George Bush mask on. Because I think that would look funny as hell. Anyways. These are the products I will be endorsing. Feel free to start using them now.

Trojan Condoms Magnum XL
No not because my penis is as big as my arm. I'm endorsing this specific type of condoms so everyone will just think my penis is as big as my arm. Sucks to be the guy thats gotta wear that snugger fit one. Even people with small penises can buy this product. Doesn't mean they have to use it but just think of the boost of confidence when you walk up to that counter packing some fucking heat. I'm sure the insanely hot girl working there (cuz there's always some insanely hot slut working behind a register almost everywhere you go.) will jump the counter and have sex with you on the spot. In front of everyone.

Craftsman 18in Chainsaw
Just think of all the fucking fun you could have with that sweet piece of machinery. You could like do the hedges and make your front yard look all spiffy. And then you could put on a giant chicken suit and go on a fucking mass murderous rampage through your favorite store. I personally don't own one of these. And I'm sure if I did I wouldn't be here talking to you now. I'd be out making yards look nice. Right.

Mountain Dew
One of the best fucking sodas on the planet. Actually regular Mountain Dew tastes like crap sometimes. I prefer Code Red. It's fucking awesome. Like me. And while you're out buying soda hit up the liquor store for me and get me some fucking Jack and Johnny. We're gonna party like its 1899. Bitches.

4/16/05 12:23 am

Old Navy commercials.
Just about the only place you'll find a group of culturally diverse people join together in praise and dance over a pair of fucking khakis. I hate your fucking khakis. Your store makes me want to hang myself. Your commercials remind me just how stupid people can look wearing your lame ass clothes. I hope the grim reaper pays each and every one of your employees a visit this year.

Scenes. I'm not exactly sure when this happened. I wasn't paying attention. Sometime in between the grunge trend and the nu metal trend this fucking scene shit started up. Boys that wear makeup, girls clothing, and have holes in their ears big enough to stick my dick through. Girls that look like they've been deprived of food and sunlight for the past couple of years. I'm almost positive 90% of them don't listen to the bands they proudly display on their oh so fashionable hoodies. They multiply like cancer and you can't go to a show without running into a circle of them fucking dancing to a band worthy of a murderous rampaging mosh pit. It's sad.

Boring ass fucking LiveJournals.
You know I just don't care if Tommy doesn't like you. Or if Becky is a slut and gets fucked in the ass by your inbred fucking redneck brother. You're uninteresting and I think you're taking up too much fucking space on the internet. At least MY LiveJournal gives one or two people laughs every now and then. You've accomplished nothing. Nothing but proving how fucking boring you are. Unplug your computer, kill Becky, give Tommy a fucking blowjob and SHUT THE FUCK UP.

People that like Scott Peterson.
The guy is a fucking homosexual douche-bag. Yet I go on google to find some laughs and I end up with this shit.. "god Scott Peterson is a hottie is there any way that I could get invited to the execution? i would love nothing more than to press my tits against the windows of the chamber while he is getting injected. i know Scott would love it too!". What the fuck is with that shit? You think he's really gonna care about seeing some busted ass boobies when he's about to die? Why don't I whip out my dick and smack you in the face while you got your saggy ass tits on the glass. Maybe that'll knock some fucking sense into your stupid ass. Moron.

Applebee's curb service bullshit.
I just saw this dumb fucking commercial. Order your food and we'll take it right to your car! GREAT! It's called a fucking drive thru. And you've been beaten to the punch by about 20 fucking years. If it weren't for your rather awesome buffalo wings and chicken fingers I would firebomb all your locations and stab your president in the eye with a straw.

I walk into Wal-Mart maybe once every month or so. About 20 seconds after I make it past the CSM Podium (which carries about 1000 bucks in it.. for all you thieves out there..) I hear this on the loudspeaker. "Security scan all departments. Safety sweep all departments." That part is relatively normal. They have to say that all the time. I guess to prevent shoplifters. It doesn't work though. And I don't think they'll ever get the hint. But whatever. 5 seconds later, "Assistant Manager please call 111 code 99". Or something close to that I wasn't paying attention. Anyways after 5 mins I got some dickwad stalking me like a fat bitch stalks a buffet. So I decided to be clever and fuck with him. I pick up just about anything I can and put it back. Sometimes picking up multiple things in one shot. Just to fuck with his head. I'm assuming it's safe I'm not really stealing anything and there's just no way it can be an offense to pick shit up and put it back down. So I do that for about 20 minutes. I go to the registers (teaming with suits and ties by now) and I buy a soda. I pay. I take my receipt. And I wave it to the people greeter. And I walk out to the front. A few seconds later about 5 or 6 people come running outside to see where I went. But I was off to the side just laughing at them. Now while I was doing all that shit just to be a dick they probably lost about 1000-2000 in merchandise from the real thieves out there. Gotta love it.

4/1/05 02:14 am

The end.
I'm tired of being me. So yesterday I went to Wal-Mart and I bought a gun. Scary how easy it was. Anyway in a few minutes I'm going to shoot myself. I have this video on my computer. A guy gets put in some interrogation room. Then he drinks some water and pulls out a gun and blasts himself in the head. It looks really painful but after 3 or 4 seconds you could tell he was done for. So. 3 or 4 seconds sounds pretty good to me. Wish me luck.Collapse )

3/28/05 02:04 pm

Why do stupid people talk to me?
me: do i know you?
prksmnd: i found u on found a buddy
me: im not on find a buddy
prksmnd: YEAH U R
me: riiight
me: haha no.
me: whats my bio say then
me: it doesnt say anything about being single and my screen name isnt on there anyway
prksmnd: YES IT IS
me: no clue
prksmnd: SMARTASS
me: theres a button by the "a" key called caps lock. press on it.
prksmnd: happy
me: ecstatic
prksmnd: u know for 23 u complaine a lot!!:-$
me: you know for 18 you should know how to spell complain and you
prksmnd: sorry
prksmnd: big baby
prksmnd: :'(
me: yea you are
prksmnd: no u are
prksmnd: :-D
me: Y-O-U
prksmnd: U-U-U-
prksmnd: :-!
prksmnd: :-Pthis is how u shortin words
prksmnd: duh
me: shorten
me: you're hopeless
prksmnd: shut up
prksmnd: you're hopeless
me: at least i can spell
prksmnd: :-X>:o
prksmnd: and after all i am a girl
prksmnd: :-*
me: that's not a valid excuse sorry
prksmnd: yes it is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
prksmnd: :-)
me: i feel bad for your friends and family. sad.
prksmnd: well i feel bad for yours they raised a cry baby!!!!!!!!!
prksmnd: :'(
me: yep
prksmnd: oh so you agree your a big baby
me: you're. and no.
me: you should take some english courses
prksmnd: i am a baby my dads
me: sucks to be him.
prksmnd: i get what i want and when and when i want it
prksmnd: so bite me
prksmnd: :-$
me: get an education then.
prksmnd: i do have an education thank you very much!
prksmnd: :-)
me: a bad one.
prksmnd: what ever
prksmnd: you need to have some respect for other people!
me: i only respect people that spell properly.
prksmnd: bite me!
prksmnd: =-O
me: wow you sure got me there.
prksmnd: shut up and get a life
prksmnd: or at least a new one
me: you're the one searching for friends on the internet. maybe you should.
prksmnd: ok it was sat. and i was not doing anything so ha
me: and now it's monday. and you can't spell.
prksmnd: and?
prksmnd: maybe i feel like not spelling!
prksmnd: :-!
me: or maybe you're just retarded.
prksmnd: no maybe you are sorry dumb a**
me: are you religious?
prksmnd: very
me: god told me to tell you to jump off a bridge.
prksmnd: fu
me: no thanks.

3/27/05 08:04 am

Massive Advertising
I stumbled on some forum with all those free "scam" sites. So I started signing up for them. And holy fuck most of them offer paypal cash and cashiers checks. I'm gonna put all the links down here and I'm putting what I'm gonna try and get from them. It's worth a shot right?

fillmycloset $250 gift card
freesupergiftcards.com $250 gift card
pctech4free.com $300 cashiers check
tech4free $300 cashiers check
autotech4free $300 cashiers check
oddtech4free $300 cashiers check
pdatech4free $300 cashiers check
freegamingsystems.com playstation 2
pvps4free.com $450 + $75 paypal
notebooks4free.com $1000 + $90 paypal
psps4free $250 + $35 paypal
cameras4free.com $325 + $50 Paypal
ds4free.com $150 Paypal + Madden NFL 2005 Nintendo DS game
giftcerts4free.com $500 Paypal
4freespot.com $1000 Paypal
gears4free.com $375 Paypal

3/23/05 02:38 am

Hate your job? Kill your boss.
Oh my motherfucking god. I have the found the most disgusting and offensive site I've ever seen in my entire life. Basically in a nutshell, it's this group of "Moms" who are protesting against shows on TV. This is how it works. They send emails (tons) to corporations to stop sponsoring shows on television. Claiming that tax-payers hard earned money goes into shows on TV and they demand to be heard. Well. Fuck them. Your hard earned tax dollars go into killing poor fucking people all over the world too. Those dollars go into bullets, tanks, missiles, and bombs. And god knows what else. And you have the fucking nerve to pick at harmless entertaining tv shows. Is your life so incomplete and miserable that you have nothing better to do but bitch over and over at companies until they get fed up with your shit and just do what you want? They're anti-condom ads, they bitch at any commercial that airs during the medium, southpark, the shield, and those desperate housewives. And even if the channel has good wholesome decent shows they still want them shut down. Why? Because it's television. Kids don't need television. Or music. Or art. Or anything. Children need to be slaves and do what they're told. They need to have friends that aren't of a different color. They need to be virgins until they're married. They need to defend "God" no matter what. They need to be as close minded as possible. Because change is bad. Parents are afraid of change. Of rebellion. They think that one day their kid is going to be president. And you know what? If things keep up the way they are.. it'll happen. Sooner or later religion is going to come back and control everything. It's already on the dollar. Whether you acknowledge it or not. In God We Trust. It's the basis of marriage. There's a church in every town. Sunday mornings are spent in churches or watching televised broadcasts of church. Middle America is banding an army of religion. But you know what? It's all a fucking trend. One of these days people are gonna look up after seeing what a shitty fucking world they live in and ask for help. And it's not going to come. Wanna know why? Because all that faith you have don't mean dick. You think if there really was a god, who had infinite wisdom, and loved all his children.. you really think he would let us act this way? Go to a store and watch real live moms and dads handle their kids. They beat the shit out of them. Now you could be an asshole and say "Oh that's what earthquakes and floods and fires and accidents are". Well you're a god damn idiot. This planet is alive as much as we are. It's not growing but things are shifting around. That explains earthquakes. We completely fucked up the o zone so anything weather related (tornadoes, storms, etc) is completely our fault. Accidents are caused by stupid fucking people. It's all part of life. And, hypothetically if there was a real god, why would he be favoring america over everyone else? Every religion has their own theory about a god or gods. Why is it that America has the "right" theory? Because we have an army that'll take over your fucking country if you fuck with us. That's why. And so long as we have those troops that will do anything the general's want (because if they don't they go to prison) the god that stands for liberty and justice and the illusion of freedom will remain here in America. On the dollar bill, and on your change, and on your fucking bumper stickers with that WWJD bullshit. Jesus would go get drunk and fuck some bitches. That's what he'd do. Now follow suit. And shut the fuck up. Thanks.
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